On Thursdays, we will try to write about “purpose” — this can include things such as how to find your purpose; spiritual issues; or just anything we think relates to the search for “purpose” for our Happiness Project.

My son and I recently read the book “The Three Questions” by Jon Muth. 
It is a lovely, peaceful book about a boy searching for the answer to 3 questions: ”When is the best time to do things? Who is the most important one? What is the right thing to do? ”  Questions we all struggle with at times. 

The little boy ultimately talks to the turtle, Leo (why are turtles always portrayed as wise?  I must investigate this).  The boy learns from Leo, and from his own actions, that now is the most important time, and the one you are with is the most important one, and the right thing to do is to do good for that one (written much more eloquently than I just did). 

My son ( 6 years old) really enjoyed the story and seemed to understand the basic message.  The illustrations are lovely as well. It is definitely a book we could read again and again. I especially love it when I read a book that reminds me stop and appreciate my son as we read it.  This is one of those books.

Posted under Happiness Project, Purpose

The Whirlwind Brothers

Every Thursday, we will write about “purpose” — this can include things such as how to find your purpose; spiritual issues; or just anything we think relates to the search for “purpose”  for our Happiness Project.

Joseph Campbell (who coined one of my husband’s favorite phrases: “follow your bliss.”) says that  ”the privilege of a lifetime is being who you are”.  That is our purpose.  I have struggled (and still do at times) with trying to please everyone and with caring too much about what others think.  I think we all struggle with being who we are rather than who others think we should be.

I don’t want my son to have this constant need to please. One of the hardest things I have found, however, is to balance the need for wanting to protect him with truly letting him be who he is.

I have been put to the test many times  – including when he declared he wanted to take his imaginary friends to show and tell (you know, the ones I initially helped him create).  I could picture other kids giggling, making fun and telling him in no uncertain terms that these “friends” were not real.

I tried to talk him out of it by saying since they were imaginary, there was no “show” and you have to have a “show” for show and tell. He thought about this and the next day declared he was going to draw a picture of his imaginary friends so his classmates could see what they look like. This would be his “show”.

This was a great idea, but I felt it was my duty as a parent to sit him down and explain to him that others might not understand having imaginary friends and may even laugh. He declared - “that’s ok, I still want to bring them”. He drew his picture and he took it to school. I worried all day about how it would go. 

The day was completely without incident. He had a great time. I don’t know if anyone laughed, but he didn’t care if they did.  His imaginary friends were a very important part of his life and he wanted to share them; he wanted to be himself.  I am thankful I did not stop him from doing so. 

My son is a boy with a wonderfully creative side who doesn’t mind showing it. He needs to show it and share it with others to fully be himself. He understood that and taught me the lesson this time.

Posted under Purpose, Spiritual

Every Thursday, we will write about “purpose” — this can include things such as how to find your purpose; spiritual issues; or just anything we think relates to the search for “purpose”  for our Happiness Project.

We are thinking of getting a dog for Christmas (we are asking Santa for one, so we’ll see).  We are taking all the necessary steps to make sure it would feel safe during such a busy time and we are all staying home for days after he or she arrives.  Sometimes I think I am crazy.  Why do we want to get a dog that will add so much extra work for each of us; will introduce us again to the pooping and peeing we have really not had to talk about too much in the last few years, and whose schedule we will have to accommodate each time we leave?

I always come back to one answer: love.   I  want my son to have a dog to love.

We recently learned that the dog we had many years ago, but had to give up to a wonderful family due to various personal reasons, passed away this week.  She was a sweet dog that we loved a lot, and I can feel that even more now that I know she is gone.  Even though we had to give her up, it always helped knowing where she was and how she was doing.  We will miss her.

I don’t know much about what our higher purpose is and I certainly don’t have many answers on this, but I do know that a large part of it is to love and be loved.  And that’s what we will have with a new dog.

Posted under Happiness Project, Purpose

Every Thursday, we will write about “purpose” — this can include things such as how to find your purpose; spiritual issues; or just anything we think relates to the search for “purpose” for our Happiness Project.

As we have noted, many of us are looking for our “life’s purpose” or just trying to do something that seems meaningful.  I think this is a journey rather than a destination, but I do believe that we should encourage our children in areas which may help them feel like they are reaching this purpose.  

The Childhood Roots of Adult Happiness discusses the importance of encouraging children in areas to which they seem partcularly drawn. If your child has an interest in art, even if you don’t, try to find ways to help foster this interest.  Even if this area of interest doesn’t become their “calling” or life purpose, the more things they have to fall back on that they enjoy, the happier they will be as adults.      

My son’s current interest is making books. He loves to write stories, draw pictures with the stories and then read them aloud.   Recently when we discussed what kind of “extra” class he might want to take after school next semester, he said he wanted a class where he could learn more about writing books and making up stories.  He really has a love for words and is very creative.  I feel an obligation to help him pursue this interest; even if it never becomes more than the joy he has this year with books, that’s ok.  This could be something he does for many years and I want him to have the chance to pursue it.

I haven’t been able to find any after school classes that are for little writers though.  We will keep looking. 

In the meantime, I wanted to share with you Scribble Press.  I have mentioned it previously, but they have recently added many things to their website and I am in Love. As their website says:  ” Scribble Press was created by two moms, Darcy Pollack and Anna Barber, as a place for kids and families to write, illustrate and publish their own books.” For those in the LA area, they offer writing and book making classes.  Someone please create this here!

There are so many fun story-making options at Scribble Press.  You must check it out for great gift options for your budding artist or author ! It may not be their life’s purpose, but it can sure provide joy!

Posted under Happiness Project, Purpose, Storytelling

Every Thursday, we will write about “purpose” — this can include things such as how to find your purpose; spiritual issues; or just anything we think relates to the search for “purpose”  for our Happiness Project.

“What should I do with my life?” Have you ever asked yourself this question?   If not, you are lucky.  I think many people search for the answer to this question throughout their lives.  I know that I really started asking myself this question after I quit my job as an attorney and decided to stay at home with my son.  

I am still searching for the answer to this question, but I have also learned along the way that there is not just one answer to the question.  And, even when  you find the “answer”, it’s not a forever answer. Life changes;  you change; understanding this has helped me.

A book I wanted to share today is one many of you may have read. Po Bronson’s aptly title “What Should I do With My Life: The True Story of People Who Answered the Ultimate Question,” was one of the first books I read when I started asking this question.  It is not a self-help book or a life plan, but rather is a book of stories about real people and their experiences.  When you read about real people and their thoughts and dreams, somehow it puts your own into perspective.  There were some stories I related to more than others, but if I read it again today, I know that different stories might be important to me.     

One of my favorites was a story about a lawyer who later became a cupcake chef in Washington, DC.  Since I was living there at the time, I actually went to his restaurant and bought some cupcakes for my son’s birthday as my way of silently supporting his choice to do what he loved.

Posted under Happiness Project, Purpose