On Wednesdays, we hope to write about “giving to others” as part of our Happiness Project.   

Yesterday was such an historic day, with the inauguration of the first African-American President.  My son was able to watch the inaugural address at school and my husband and I watched it at home.  It was a great moment for America, but the best thing about President Obama’s election seems to be that he realizes that it is not about him.  It’s about us. It’s about community and togetherness, but also about the importance of each individual.  

I thought one of President Obama’s most important  lines from his speech came after discussing all the problems facing America . He stated  that “[l]ess measurable but no less profound is a sapping of confidence across our land — a nagging fear that America’s decline is inevitable, and that the next generation must lower its sights.”  

It is nice to know that he recognizes that people are doubting, people are struggling and people are losing confidence.  It seems too often over the last few years that many have felt that things are falling apart with little we can do to help it.  We have not been asked to help; we have not been asked to be part of the solution.  However, one of Obama’s strongsuits seems to be that he acknowledges our fears and then enlists each of us to do our part in fighting through them  – his call for service and accountability on our parts is needed and beneficial.  When we feel like we are part of the solution, we are empowered and our confidence can stay strong. 

This year was the first year I have spent time on Martin Luther King Day performing acts of service. It was a great day as we held a book drive for miltary families with my son. He was very excited to be a part of it as we decorated with red, white and blue balloons and greeted people as they stopped by with books.  It felt great, for as President Obama seems to realize, as you give to others, you get a little more for yourself as well.

Posted under Giving to Others

My son and I are loving this video of “The Elephant Song — by Eric Herman”:

Posted under Uncategorized

The Whirlwind Brothers

Every Thursday, we will write about “purpose” — this can include things such as how to find your purpose; spiritual issues; or just anything we think relates to the search for “purpose”  for our Happiness Project.

Joseph Campbell (who coined one of my husband’s favorite phrases: “follow your bliss.”) says that  ”the privilege of a lifetime is being who you are”.  That is our purpose.  I have struggled (and still do at times) with trying to please everyone and with caring too much about what others think.  I think we all struggle with being who we are rather than who others think we should be.

I don’t want my son to have this constant need to please. One of the hardest things I have found, however, is to balance the need for wanting to protect him with truly letting him be who he is.

I have been put to the test many times  – including when he declared he wanted to take his imaginary friends to show and tell (you know, the ones I initially helped him create).  I could picture other kids giggling, making fun and telling him in no uncertain terms that these “friends” were not real.

I tried to talk him out of it by saying since they were imaginary, there was no “show” and you have to have a “show” for show and tell. He thought about this and the next day declared he was going to draw a picture of his imaginary friends so his classmates could see what they look like. This would be his “show”.

This was a great idea, but I felt it was my duty as a parent to sit him down and explain to him that others might not understand having imaginary friends and may even laugh. He declared - “that’s ok, I still want to bring them”. He drew his picture and he took it to school. I worried all day about how it would go. 

The day was completely without incident. He had a great time. I don’t know if anyone laughed, but he didn’t care if they did.  His imaginary friends were a very important part of his life and he wanted to share them; he wanted to be himself.  I am thankful I did not stop him from doing so. 

My son is a boy with a wonderfully creative side who doesn’t mind showing it. He needs to show it and share it with others to fully be himself. He understood that and taught me the lesson this time.

Posted under Purpose, Spiritual

Every Wednesday, we hope to write about “giving to others” as part of our Happiness Project.   

“When you choose to serve — whether it’s your nation, your community or simply your neighborhood — you are connected to that fundamental American ideal that we want life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness not just for ourselves, but for all Americans. That’s why it’s called the American dream.”  – Barack Obama

This Monday, January 19th is a National Day of Service.  President-Elect Obama has called on America to step up on Martin Luther King, Jr Day and make a lasting commitment to our communities and country.  If you are looking for a way to give back on this day, go to  USAService.org.

There are thousands of volunteer opportunities listed by community — from blood drives to book collections (like one hosted by Operation Shower), from planting gardens to helping out by painting at schools.  

If your kids will be out of school and you can even do one thing and let them know it’s in honor of Martin Luther King Jr Day, I would say it’s been a good day. 

Posted under Uncategorized

Every Tuesday, we will write about “play” and how adults and children alike can have this in their lives.

This is one of my favorite stories that always makes me laugh — I thought I would share again:

My [at the time] 4 year old son, Keilan, is an only child and loves to play — as long as it is with someone.  He does not enjoy playing by himself.  He needs someone to appreciate how fast he is.  He needs someone to be the villain to his hero.  He needs someone to watch his made-up shows, to chase him around the room — someone to talk to while he eats his cereal.  That someone is me, or his dad.    

It doesn’t stop there.  When Keilan gets bored playing with me (ordinary mom), he wants me to be other people.   Not as in a character in a story, but actually pretending to be someone else as his playmate.  For example, if something new or exciting happens,  he wants to tell someone about it.   Well, since I (mom) have  already seen or heard about this new story, he asks me to pretend to be someone else so he can tell them (me) about what he knows.  For example, ”Mom, will you be Nana so I can tell her about this.”  ”Ok, I’m Nana”.  “Nana, did you know my mommy got me this new toy — look how cool it is.”  “Wow, Keilan that’s great.”  And, I will continue to be Nana until he feels he has told “her” enough details about the new toy. Then, he wants me to be Papa so he can tell him about the toy as well.  And so on. 

I do love the creativity and energy of my son, but it makes me tired. 

In my effort to combat his constant need for my attention, I came up with what I thought was a brilliant idea.  I would help my son to create an imaginary friend.   First, I suggested that sometimes instead of playing with Mommy or Daddy, he could have an imaginary friend.   He seemed to like the idea initially and thought of the name “Heffridge” for his friend.   A strange name, yes, but I did not inquire further for fear of slowing the momentum.  I explained to my son that Heffridge would always be there to play with or talk to if he needed him and, when he had something exciting to tell, Heffridge would always listen. We were on a roll.   

But then, I went too far. Read More…

Posted under Play, Random Thoughts

A funny, touching and true reading by Kelly Corrigan, author of The Middle Place.

Posted under Connecting

Although I enjoy writing about what will make us happy and what are useful things to work towards, I also agree with the  idea put forth in this article on Zen Habits – “stop waiting for happiness. Happiness is right here, right now.”  

I think many of us felt that this holiday season as we spent a little less and enjoyed our time with family. Happiness is now.

Posted under Happiness Project

I wanted to share with you a post on Real Simple magazine from a new friend of mine, Amy Belle Isle.  She is a wonderful party planner here in St Louis, with Stem,  and was a HUGE help with Operation Give Thanks, my first attempt at hosting a fundraiser! 

She is truly a great lady as you can tell by her article Here with great ideas on paying it forward this holiday season.  If you are running out of ideas (or even if you are not), do this!!

Posted under Gratitude

This week, my categories and entries are all out of sorts (snow days and holiday shopping will do that). So, here’s a way to connect with your child, play and give to others ! Make cookies like these, pretend to be silly reindeer introducing themselves and give some to co-workers or friends or a local shelter. 

Aren’t these reindeer cookies adorable? Brought to you courtesy of Mariah and Harrison — two of the most creative people I know.  But credit should also go to Family Fun magazine’s December issue, where they got the idea (although I do love the peanut cookie shape best). 

Posted under Connecting, Holidays

As part of our version of the Happiness Project, we are trying to continue to “learn” — anything.  This week , Jen learns she just might be “hip.”  Stay tuned for future technology adventures. 

“You had me at scrolling.” ~Steve Jobs on the iPhone

I’m in love with my iPhone.  I am not a gadget person.  I’m not a hipster.  I am a mom of two and seriously afraid of being a shlumpadinka, both in appearance and in mindset.  I am also an underbuyer.  So is my husband.  And somehow we waited in line for 5 hours to get iPhones.  I thought we’d enjoy the gadget-y-ness for a few days and then be mad we spent so much money for a phone (a key element of being an underbuyer).  Not so.  It has changed my life.  If feel more connected, organized, productive and sane because of it.  Because all of that, and because its cool, I even feel a little less shlump!

This is not an ad for Apple products, but the iPhone is perfect for a mom.  I can stay connected through email without having to sit down!  I can stay informed and read the NY Times any time I have a spare 5 minutes (waiting in line, waiting to pick up my daughter, NOT waiting for a light to turn green), and I don’t have to buy a paper or sit down!   I can map my route after I’m in the car and realize I forgot to map it! I can Facebook, craigslist, eBay and track my fitness when I get a spare second!  And best of all, I can take pictures of the kids and email them, in the moment, to Daddy.   He loves this when he travels.  He feels connected to our routine and our daily joys even when he isn’t in person.

It isn’t a replacement for actual time with people we love, but this thing helps make things less hectic and fills the gaps that are there when being in person isn’t possible.  I’ve also realized how fantastic it is to have access to a little package of “me” in my pocket at all times.  My email, my hobbies, my favorite newspaper.  A little dose of world news in the midst of a kid-centered routine is probably what moms of the 50s were looking for when they took a swig in the middle of the day.  I can get a quick fix and get right back to sweeping the floor, refereeing the fight or cuddling with my kids and a book with a clearer head.

Posted under Connecting, Happiness Project, Learning, Tech, Uncategorized